I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Randomize