Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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