Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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