But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
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