definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
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