Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
