I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
