Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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