Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
Farmville is her only friend.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
