Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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