Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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