we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
