You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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