I feel like abortions should bother me more
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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