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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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