I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
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