All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
This gyro tastes like lonliness
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Randomize
