He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize