Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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