...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
