weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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