Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
