Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize
