Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
