If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
