Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
either way he was missing a nipple.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I pour the whiskey from now on
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize