that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
