sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
they're like a gay fantastic four
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Randomize
