a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
