facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
