She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
FUCK WHALES
Randomize
