i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Randomize
