Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
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