But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
