Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize
