he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
