Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Randomize
