we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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