is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Randomize
