is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
