I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
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