STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Randomize