Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
do nipples grow back?
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