just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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