We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
A+ Viking dick
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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