When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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