this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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