some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
