Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Randomize
