There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
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