Hey man sorry I got all grabby
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
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